God’s love, forgiveness make baptized grandparent ‘feel new every day’

Linda and Bradley Butler stand before the altar of SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral in Indianapolis. Bradley was brought into full communion with the Catholic Church in the cathedral during the Easter Vigil Mass on March 31. Linda, his wife of 38 years, was his sponsor. (Submitted photo)

By Natalie Hoefer

Ever since he married his Catholic wife Linda in 1979, Bradley Butler, now 63, has been going to Mass. The Butlers raised their daughter Hilari in the Church. Their grandchildren are Catholic.

But it was not until a few years ago that Butler considered becoming Catholic.

(Related: Welcome, new Catholics)

Throughout his married life, says Butler, “I really felt like an outsider [in the Church]. I didn’t get anything out of the Mass. I felt like an imposter.”

Such a feeling might be expected, given Butler’s early upbringing in the Pentecostal faith. But his call to be Catholic actually began at the age of 19.

“It was strong,” he says of the call. “It lasted for months. But I kept resisting because I didn’t think I was worthy.”

Despite Butler’s feeling of unworthiness and of being an imposter in the Catholic Church, he did experience an “awakening” of faith during a long hospital stay after a serious car accident in 1997, two years after moving to Indiana.

“I had one of those awakenings where I knew I had to do serious work,” recalls Butler, a professionally trained artist. “I was doing horrible work, just to make a living. I decided, ‘I’m going to start doing the Lord’s work.’ Those were my exact words.”

When he was able to look for a job, Butler was referred to a liturgical consultant.

“She said, ‘I can squeeze you in for five minutes,’ and even when I got there I still had to wait,” he says. “She started looking at my portfolio, then she looked at me and said, ‘Where have you been?’ I just about cried.”

With Butler’s experience creating stained glass pieces, the consultant had him interview for a commission to create stained glass windows for a church in Greenfield.

He remembers the intimidation he felt, having a time slot between a studio in Chicago and one in St. Louis.

Nevertheless, when his turn came, says Butler, “I started talking. I had no idea what to say. I had never done anything like that. But I was passionate, and they picked me.”

Butler now runs an art glass studio with his son-in-law, Andrew Vargo. They create stained glass windows and other glass projects for churches in several states.

It was his daughter and son-in-law who introduced Butler and his wife to SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral Parish in Indianapolis late in 2016. And it was there, after 37 years of feeling like an outsider, that Butler first began to feel comfortable with the Church.

“I can’t tell you when, but I know what it was,” says Butler of the reason for the change. “I went up and got a blessing [during Communion]. I’d never done that before. That’s when it happened—I starting to feel welcomed and comfortable.

“… And then I started to really appreciate the Mass. I really started to get almost enthusiastic and looked forward to going to Mass. … I never understood what God’s love was. I never felt it, but I started to feel it. It started coming in slowly, then it just grew more and more during the RCIA [Rite of Christian Initiation for Adults] process.”

He asked Linda—whom he says never pressured him to become Catholic—to be his sponsor.

“Her going through the classes has renewed her faith,” says Butler. “It wasn’t just for me—it was for her, too.”

But there was still the problem of him feeling unworthy.

“When I started studying with Father Pat[rick Beidelman, rector of SS. Peter and Paul Cathedral Parish] and the deacons, they just laughed at me when I said that [I felt unworthy],” says Butler. “I thought I was the only one. They said, ‘Welcome to the club!’ ”

During the Easter Vigil Mass at the cathedral on March 31 when Butler received the sacraments of initiation, he recalls feeling “so happy, and I just felt like everyone I loved, even my [deceased] grandparents and aunts and uncles, and my dad who passed away in January, were all with me. I remember having that sensation that everything from my past was propelling me into the future.”

For his confirmation saint, he chose St. Joan of Arc, who inspires him “by the courage she had to follow her faith and lead her country.”

Although he did not choose a patron saint of artists, art does enter into his thoughts about the Catholic Church.

“From early Christian times through the Renaissance up until even the early 1800s, all the important Western art was done for the Church,” he explains. “I like that connection. When I look at the [sanctuary] and I look at the windows, I’m just moved by them and [the fact] that the same [format of the] Mass has been going for so long.”

Art aside, Butler says that “learning more about the faith has taught me more about being human. I am among everyone else who is flawed. I understand how God can see me and still love me. Forgiveness is daily, and every day I feel new.” †